Losing my Sabbath?

We are one month in on this sabbatical, things are running pretty well, lots of enjoyable get togethers, lots of time to do the things I want to do, the pace is good, I am very much enjoying NOT having to deal with the usual things like deadlines, rehearsals, meetings, conflict resolution, creative logjams, etc etc etc.  I feel relaxed, open, content.  Joyful!

And then, something happens.  I am suddenly reminded of an issue that will be waiting for me when I get back in August, some visional clarification that will very likely involve my needing to have some heart-to-heart conversations, and to voice the concerns I have as well as listening to and mediating the concerns of others.  For an empath like myself, the spectre of this issue (that shall remain nameless) suddenly sucks me down into a vortex of anxiety, worry and even a mild sense of depression.

This happened late last week, and sent me sprawling.  Try as I might, I couldn't seem to shake it so easily.  Carina could tell I was stewing.  I started getting mad at the situation, and mad at myself for having lost my sabbatical 'zen' (sorry for the borrowed phrase!)

It helped to talk it through for sure, and a couple of conversations as well as some personal journalling on the issue got it sorted out and organized for me in my own headspace.  But through the weekend, it kept looming, like some sort of ghost rising up from a grave ("WOOOOoooooooo !!"  :~)

This morning I arose and went about my typical start-of-the-day devotional exercises, and that's when God seemed to speak a word into me that set me back on the path.  He reminded me that Sabbath, (or in my case, 'Sabbatical') is about remembering that while I rest, God continues to work.  It is His will for this sabbatical that I . . . REST!  To allow work to creep in and occupy headspace again is to try and wrest control and security away from God in a way that dishonors not only His commanded sabbath rest for me, but also His Very Nature!

Today went much better, and I am feeling restful in Him.  He will lead and equip me for the return to work in August.  I will rest secure in that. 

P.S. - we raised ALL our support for Quito, reaching and exceeding the goal over the weekend - that's a BIG "YAY GOD !!!!"